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View Full Version : 10-year-old daughter switching schools; Any advice?


lovemydaughter
02-07-2010, 07:20 AM
Hello everyone!

For reasons too lengthy to post here, we are switching schools for my 10-year-old daughter (with Spina Bifida) next school year. Her 13-year-old (typical) brother already transferred to the new school after Christmas break and really likes it. I have a lot of anxiety about my daughter switching because she has been in (private) school with this group of children since kindergarten. They have grown up with her disability so don't even seem to notice it anymore. She has made a lot of friends there, but now we do need to switch to a new (private) school. My husband and I both feel that we are making the right decision for our children, but I just hope and pray that our daughter will be received by the children at this new school as well as she has been by the children at her current school. I worry that it will be so different because she will be going into 5th grade, when children are beginning to focus a lot on looks and physical appearance. Our daughter is a pretty, smart, confident, and strong-willed girl but wears AFO braces, toddles back and forth when she walks, and uses a walker for long distances, so the handicap will be very obvious. She is also somewhat overweight. She is usually pretty outgoing and does tend to make friends easily, which will be to her advantage. But I know that kids at this age can be cruel and insensitive. That is my concern. I know that I can't prevent some kids from being insensitive and that we will handle anything like that together if it should happen and the world won't end. But is there anything I could say (to her or the school) or do to help this transition go as smoothly as possible? I am new to this site and have already read some great insights, so I am interested in your advice.

NerdaliciouS
02-15-2010, 01:15 PM
I've had to move multiple, multiple times in my life. There really is no "easy way" of doing it. You just adapt. I'm sure she can keep in contact with her friends, right? There will always be cruel people out there, regardless of age. I'm sure she'll make friends fairly quickly!

The best thing I can think of is to let her keep in contact with the old ones, and keep her busy! Have fun! You'd be surprised how easily kids, disabled and non, adapt. =P

I'd honestly just tell her that this gives her a bigger opportunity to make even MORE friends! That usually works, lol. Sorry I can't be much help otherwise!

Hopefully everything goes well. :)

angel
02-15-2010, 08:22 PM
Welcome to the group. I switched schools when I was younger but always found my way around. My disability was also obvious but never seemed to have trouble making friends. Yes i did deal with some kids (other girls mostly) who were insensitive and rude but as long as i could find one friend I didn't really care. In the interest of full disclosure I was never the kind of child that needed to be liked by everyone. I could get along with anybody for the most part however if someone was mean to me it kind of rolled off my back without to much harm. Odds were i didn't really like them either lol. I think it is just an aspect of my personality.
I think her experiences will be of an advantage to her as she has made friends before and done well. Those skills will serve her well. It sounds like she is very sociable and I am sure has a great personality, she will be fine. You will weather through the tough times together if they arise and she will live through them and learn from them as all people do.

Angel